Usually these, “I gave up blah blah blah and here’s what happened,” blog posts end in a positive revelation to encourage you to follow suite. This is not that type of article.
If it were a movie it would be more Coen Brothers than Disney. But, if I did have to take away a positive, then I learned patience and appreciation for our luxuries.
My only hope for getting through this time is I have alternatives other than the oven and stove-top. Thank goodness we live in non-archaic times. I am blessed with an electric tea kettle, toaster oven, griddle, popcorn popper, and fryer. I also have a slow cooker, but as the slower cooker does the exact opposite of a microwave, it will not be mentioned here.
I do regret not following my gut on those infomercials. I really could use three-types of heat.
This time it was not my fault. No, my microwave died all on its own. It made its last popcorn and 7:30 pm on Monday May 8, 2017. It was at 7:35 pm it would pop no more.
WARNING: Some of you WILL judge me for the over use of the microwave. The blasphemous act of microwaving water, steaming vegetables, cooking rice or eggs and bacon. Yeah I do it. Although, I don't know why I admitted that. I didn't cook those things this time.
Some of you will judge me for my non-organic, non-hipster cuisine choices. I am a "grumpster," the antithesis of hipster. I was born in a generation of microwave cookbooks and convenience food that was simply inspired, okay insipid. But, it was what we had.
Okay, I don't roast a chicken in a microwave nor eat most of what's below, but I needed to paint a picture of the culture of my people. Respect my life choices and know the struggles are real.
So, I am saved from finding a pot in this instance. However, my kettle is only for water, well according to the manufacture, and I am not going to risk losing that baby. Other liquids and soups must be returned to the stove-top.
I know that one isn't such a big deal, those things are better on the stove anyway. At least for me, the husband thinks that I over heat the soup by actually bringing it to a boil. So, he just went straight for the can.
But, alas the husband's hunger grew and patience waned. We were left with internally cold nuggets despite the eternity in the oven. This one could have been saved by the deep fryer, but that has its own work of heating oil. It also comes with self-judgement and shame of eating greasy food.
(I should have bought that air-fryer on TV...)
But, there was no time for a slow thaw in the fridge. I could have changed dinner plans or resorted to the Golden Arches, but I like a challenge. This is when my addiction to cooking magazines and shows came in handy. I had some useful knowledge tucked away. Now, you will too.
The most effective way is a water bath.
Submerge the bag of meat in cool water. Running water moves it along faster. But let it thaw checking it every 30-minutes.
So the 30-minutes is a little different than 3-minutes. But, I got my burgers and with those frozen buns toasted on the griddle, it was a win.
I could continue to acclimate my life to a early 20th-century woman, or my husband can buy me a new for Mother's Day --
Hint, I chose the latter.